You can choose to live in a world where you’re terrified of darkness or you can live in a world where your Life terrifies the darkness.
I chose years ago to accept Jesus into my life, but before that, the enemy tried to convince me I was a good person, almost like God should have felt honored to have me on his team.🤦🏼♀️
I even went through a period where, looking back, I think that I thought I was a Christian, but I didn’t pray or read my Bible consistently, and honestly, I didn’t even know who God was personally. I mainly knew what the church or other “Christians” had taught me about him. It was kind of like saying I’m good buddies with Will Smith because I like his acting and we’ve been BFF’s since “The Fresh Prince of Bellaire” aired.
Then my life hit the wall of bad decisions, betrayal, and some abuse. I felt used up and like God would never want me, but I expected God to pay back the people who had hurt me. After all, that’s what the Bible says, right? “Vengeance is mine, thus sayeth the Lord. I will REPAY!!!” -Romans 12:19 (Insert Darth Vader’s “Imperial March” background music here) ⚡ (P.S. This is the danger in the hunt and peck version of God, instead of truly getting to know Him.)
But, as I waited and saw no zapping, no lighting bolts, no vengeance of God, I went through this period where the enemy convinced me that God was not real. Why not? I never saw him show up when I asked him for help, much like when Will Smith didn’t mail that check when I asked him for help with my finances.
But aren’t we buddies, Will? 😂
For a while I lived in a world overwhelmed with depression, fear, and self-abuse, and then I just decided that I would end my life, but just before I did, I uttered the words, “Jesus, if you’re real, then just show up.”
Those words terrified the enemy. I dare say they even burned in is wretched ears. He had fought me so hard at every angle to keep me from saying them. I had felt washed up and unwanted, like a used up piece of trash, and the one place I sought hope, I received judgement instead. The enemy had made sure my eyes stayed focused on that, and looking back, I’m not even sure why I said those words that night, except this–during EVERYTHING, JESUS never stopped pursuing me and never stopped loving me.
Up to that point, what I had seen was not God’s reality for my life. It was the enemy’s facade with which he had surrounded me. I once heard Tony Evans say, “If what you see is all you see, then you have not seen all there is to be seen.” I learned that the moment I called out to Jesus, and He rescued me. I immediately watched my world change.
I knew Jesus was there, because everything that wasn’t of him–all the hopelessness, all the anger, all the bitterness dissolved from my heart. It was as if Peace detonated and blew the darkness right out of the room. I still struggle to explain what happened that day, so I’ll just say this:
JESUS SHOWED UP AND EVERYTHING CHANGED!
Here’s the point, we are living in uncertain times, and many people are scared, but Jesus IS certainty, and when we belong to him, we have NOTHING to fear. He pushes back darkness. He breaks every addiction. He places our feet on stable ground. He makes all things new, and when we mess up, his mercy begins anew every morning. He provides our needs. He heals us. He is our peace. He never walks out on us. He never abandons us. He never disowns us, and if there is a separation from Him, it’s because we did to Him what He would NEVER do to us, and here’s something incredible to note, if we turn around and run back to him, he runs toward us too. (Don’t believe me, read Jesus’ story of the “Prodigal Son.”) 🙋🏼♀️❤️
So, hear me in this, if you’ve decided to live life withOUT Jesus, it’s because you’re still in the matrix of the enemy, walking through a facade and convincing yourself that it’s truth. But when you turn and seek Jesus, you will find he’s been there all the time, waiting for you to allow him to make EVERYTHING incredible, beautiful, and new in your life.
Jesus said it this way:
“I am the way, the truth, and the life…” In Him…you will find the way, God’s eternal plan for your life. In Him…you will find ALL truth. In Him…you will FIND your incredible life…2.0.
This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun! 2 Corinthians 5:17
So lay down your worries, your fears, and all your junk at His feet, take his hand, and just follow him. Your adventure awaits, and this time…it’s going to be so much better than you could ever ask or even imagine. (Ephesians 3:20)
What are you waiting for? Come on! I know the Way!